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Self-harm is a term that has historically been used to cover a broad range of behaviours. It refers to deliberately causing pain or damage to your own body, and can be suicidal or non-suicidal in intent. Self-injury is a type of self-harm, and refers to deliberately causing pain or damage to your own body without suicidal intent. Self-injury is more common in young people. Some people who self-harm may also have suicidal thoughts. Self-harm can take on different forms and its frequency can vary from person to person – some may do it once, while others can do it for many years. It can include:
Self-harm is normally a sign that a person is feeling intense emotional pain and distress. There are many support options for self-harming behaviour, whether you are seeking support for yourself or someone you care about. Getting support for self-harming behaviourIf you are self-harming and you are worried, try to talk to someone you trust – like a friend, family member, doctor, teacher or school counsellor. It can be hard to build up the courage to open up to someone, but remember, they care about your wellbeing. It may take time for them to understand, but it doesn’t mean they aren’t there for you. If you would rather talk to someone you don’t know, there are many options. You can:
Seeking help for suicidal thoughtsSometimes the distress you feel can be so overwhelming that you may have thoughts about ending your life. If you are thinking about suicide, don’t be afraid to ask for support – talk to someone you trust and feel comfortable with, such as a family member, friend, teacher, doctor or other health professional. If you or someone you know is badly hurt or is at serious risk of harm, contact emergency services. Dial triple zero (000) or visit your nearest emergency department. You can also contact your doctor or mental health crisis service. You can also call: How do I know if someone is self-harming?It can be difficult to recognise whether someone is self-harming as many people who self-harm keep it a secret. Trust your instincts, especially if you think they are distressed or in trouble. Some signs may include:
Supporting someone who self-harmsPeople who self-harm need care, understanding and support in order to recover. Stigma from others can be damaging and may stop them from getting the support they need. According to a 2012 report by Orygen (Looking the other way: young people and self-harm), it is thought up to half the people who self-harm never seek help. If you think someone you know might be self-harming, it is important to try to talk to them about it, and encourage them to seek professional help. Don’t try to force them to stop, as it can make matters worse. Talking to people who self-harm about their behaviour can be safe and very helpful if done in a supportive way. How to talk with someone who self-harmsIt can be difficult to approach someone who is self-harming. If you cannot do it on your own, ask someone else for help. and have some helpful advice on how to start a conversation with someone who self-harms. Try the following suggestions:
If the person who is self-harming is not ready to talk about it, try another time or suggest they speak to someone who makes them feel comfortable. Other ways to lower their distress may include:
It can be helpful to draft up a safety or learn mental health first aid so you know what to do in a crisis. Encourage the person to seek support for themselves, or offer to help them make contact with one or more of the suggested supports. Support people need support tooIf your child, friend or other family member is self-harming, or you think they might be, seeking support from a mental health professional is important for you too. Talk to someone you trust about what’s going on and how you feel. However, upsetting it can be to see a loved one in trouble, remember that self-harming behaviour is treatable and not everyone who self-harms is suicidal. Self-harming behaviour is treatableSelf-harming is a serious behaviour – it’s a sign someone is feeling significant distress and they’re not doing it to seek attention. Usually they are deeply ashamed and go to great lengths to hide it from others. They may suffer in silence and really need support to open up about how they are feeling. Although self-harming behaviour can be treated, many people don’t seek support because they:
No one has to cope alone; self-harming behaviour is treatable. Support can include working on recognising triggers, learning how to manage difficult emotions and help with self-care (such as caring for wounds and learning other coping strategies). For anyone who self-harms, just realising it is a not a long-term solution to problems is a step in the right direction. Once they make a decision to seek support, it’s important that they take it slowly and are not too hard on themselves. It can take time to break the cycle of self-harm and there may be setbacks along the way. Finding alternatives to self-harmIt can be difficult to break away from self-harm. Treatment will include learning to find other ways to manage intense feelings. By distracting or diverting the behaviour, feelings and urges may become less intense and decrease over time. The person who is self-harming may like to develop their own ways to distract themselves, or use some of these ideas:
Who is at risk of self-harm?People of all ages self-harm, but young people are more at risk. According to the 2015 Australian Child and Adolescent Survey of Mental Health and Wellbeing, around one in ten Australian teens have self-harmed. It is more common among girls than boys, and usually starts around the ages of 12 to 14 years, just after the onset of puberty. Those who are at increased risk of self-harm include young people:
Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander young people (aged 15–24) are five times more likely to self-harm than non-Indigenous young people. Why do people self-harm?There are many reasons why people self-harm. Even for one person the motivation can vary. Some people do it as a way of expressing their distress, taking back control or escaping from situations they find troubling. Others may find it makes them ‘feel’ something when they are numb and devoid of all feelings. Some people find self-harm gives them a sense of relief. Whatever the reason, self-harm is normally a sign that a person is feeling intense emotional pain and distress. For young people, many stressful things (stressors) happen all at once. Not only are they dealing with changes to their bodies, they are trying to juggle demands they didn’t have when they were younger (such as study, work, relationships, being more independent and having more responsibility). Stressors that may increase the risk of self-harm include:
Personal factors that may increase someone’s risk of self-harm include:
What are the risks of self-harm?Although self-harm may bring relief in the short-term, it doesn’t help the person address the reasons they are doing it in the first place. Unless the problems that are causing the self-harming behaviour are addressed, people will continue to use it as a way to cope. Unfortunately, self-harm can be dangerous – it can lead to serious injury and even accidental death. It can also lead to a higher risk of developing physical and mental health issues, substance misuse and unemployment. Although most people who self-harm don’t want to die, their behaviour can become more frequent and addictive as they seek out methods to deal with overwhelming emotions. Some people who self-harm have feelings of shame, self-loathing and helplessness and may have suicidal thoughts. Many people who attempt suicide have a history of self-harm. Where to get help
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