One of the most popular topics in positive psychology—both in the field itself and in mainstream discussion of positive psychological concepts—is resilience. Show
To some, resilience is a sort of “miracle drug” personality trait, something that can heal all wounds and right all wrongs. While resilience may not be the end-all and be-all of personality traits, it’s such a hot topic for good reason: it is a wonderful trait to have, it is related to a plethora of positive outcomes, and—perhaps most important of all—it can be improved. Read on to learn more about resilience and why it deserves every bit of the attention it gets. Before you read on, we thought you might like to download our 3 Resilience Exercises for free. These engaging, science-based exercises will help you to effectively deal with difficult circumstances and give you the tools to improve the resilience of your clients, students, or employees. What is Resilience? A DefinitionPsychology Today describes it this way:
In a nutshell, resilience can be defined as the ability – and tendency – to “bounce back.” What’s the Meaning of Bouncing Back?“Bouncing back” is what we do when we face disappointment, defeat, and failure, but instead of wallowing or letting things keep us down, we get back up and continue on with our lives. According to the APA Help Center, it’s “the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats or significant sources of stress” (APA Help Center, n.d.). You might say someone bounces back when they experience a traumatic car accident and sustain serious injuries, but stay positive and optimistic through a long physical therapy journey. Resilience and Mental Toughness: What’s the Difference?Aside from the term “bouncing back,” there are many more similar concepts that resilience is often associated with. For instance, resilience is frequently used interchangeably with “mental toughness.” So what is mental toughness? Mental toughness is “a personality trait which determines in large part how individuals deal with stress, pressure and challenge irrespective of circumstances” (Strycharczyk, 2015). It’s part hardiness (optimism and predisposition towards challenge and risk), part confidence, and it is what allows people to take whatever comes in stride, with a focus on what they can learn and gain from the experience. While the association with resilience is understandable, it’s also easy to see where they differ: resilience is what helps people recover from a setback, but mental toughness can help people avoid experiencing a setback in the first place. As Doug Strycharczyk puts it, “All mentally tough individuals are resilient, but not all resilient individuals are mentally tough” (2015). Those who are mentally tough are not only able to bounce back, they are more likely to see hardship as a welcome challenge and greet it with a smile. Resilience vs. GritAnother commonly used synonym for resilience is grit, but is grit really a synonym for resilience? According to Professor Guy Claxton’s Building Learning Power organization, grit is not just a synonym for resilience:
(Building Learning Power, n.d.). Resilience is more narrowly defined, although it is related to the same experiences, skills, and competencies. One simple way to think about the differences between resilience and grit is that resilience more often refers to the ability to bounce back from short-term struggles, while grit is the tendency to stick with something long-term, no matter how difficult it is or how many roadblocks you face. It’s great to have both resilience and grit, but it’s clear that they refer to two different traits. Mental Endurance: Yet Another Synonym?Another construct that is similar to resilience is mental endurance. Mental endurance refers to the mental or inner strength that we use to deal with our challenges. It requires willpower, self-discipline, and perseverance to develop and maintain mental endurance (Sasson, n.d.). Although it is not specific to “bouncing back” from trauma or adversity, it is related in the sense that both traits help us deal with difficulty in our lives. What is the Meaning of Fortitude?Finally, there’s fortitude—yet another word that is often used in tandem with or in lieu of “resilience.” Merriam-Webster’s dictionary defines fortitude as “strength of mind that enables a person to encounter danger or bear pain or adversity with courage.” This shares some obvious similarities with the other constructs mentioned above, namely mental toughness and mental endurance. All three are rooted in this idea of inner strength, a reserve of mental power that we can draw upon to get us through the most difficult times. The Psychology of Mental StrengthAlthough you might read about resilience (and all of the many, many traits related to it) and think that it applies to only the most inspiring, impressive, and awesome among us, resilience is surprisingly common. As the APA Help Center’s (n.d.) piece on resilience states, “Research has shown that resilience is ordinary, not extraordinary. People commonly demonstrate resilience.” Resilience isn’t about floating through life on a breeze, or skating by all of life’s many challenges unscathed; rather, it’s about experiencing all of the negative, difficult, and distressing events that life throws at you and staying on task, optimistic, and high-functioning. In fact, developing resilience basically requires emotional distress. If we never ran into disappointment in the first place, we would never learn how to deal with it. When you think about it in those terms, it’s easy to see that we all display some pretty impressive resilience. Some of us are more resilient than others, but we have all been knocked down, defeated, and despondent at some point in our lives; however, we kept going—and here we are today, stronger and more experienced. Demonstrating Resilience as an IndividualSo what does it look like to demonstrate resilience? The APA outlines a number of factors that contribute to and act as markers of resilience, including:
Author and resilience expert Glenn Schiraldi (2017) provides even more examples and characteristics of resilient people, listing strengths, traits, and coping mechanisms that are highly correlated with resilience:
In addition, these characteristics are also mentioned by Glenn Schiraldi:
To summarize, if a person has awareness (both of the self and of the environment around them), they manage their feelings effectively, keep a handle on their thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, and understand that life has its inevitable ups and downs. Why is Being Resilient so Important?You hear a lot about growing and developing resilience – both in ourselves and in children – for good reason. Therapist and counselor Joshua Miles lists a few of the wide range of reasons that resilience is a great trait to have:
The Effects of Psychological Strength on Overall HealthAlthough every point in that list is a good reason to pay attention to resilience, the last one may be most important of all. Resilience has a powerful impact on our health (and vice versa, in some ways). A recent review of the research on resilience suggested that resilience leads or contributes to many different positive health outcomes, including:
Further, resilience experts Harry Mills and Mark Dombeck point to research that resilience boosts immune system functioning. Resilient people are able to better manage negative emotions and experience more positive emotions, which leads to objectively good health outcomes like more immune system cells and better immune functioning in cancer patients, and more favorable mortality rates in marrow transplant patients (n.d.). Growing Mentally Strong as a PersonSince we know that being resilient is such a helpful trait to have, the next logical question is: How do we develop it? Luckily, resilience is not an immutable, “you have it or you don’t” sort of trait. There may be a genetic component to a person’s base level of resilience, but you are always able to improve upon the resilience you have. This add-on resilience is often referred to as “self-learned resilience.” How Self-Learned Resilience WorksSelf-learned resilience, as the name implies, is the resilience that you build up in yourself through concerted effort. It is the result of being aware of the opportunities for self-development and the courage to take advantage of them. There are many ways to build up your own reserve of self-learned resilience. Below are just a few ways to go about it from three different sources. From Dr. Carine Nzodom on using a loss or stressful event to grow:
From VeryWell Mind author Kendra Cherry:
And remember: Keep working on your skills and don’t get discouraged if it takes a while to get to the level of resilience you desire (Cherry, 2018). From Kira M. Newman at the University of California at Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center:
Raising Children to Be ResilientIf you’re a parent or a dedicated teacher or another important adult in a child’s life, you might be wondering what you can do now to help your child grow up with resilience. The American Psychological Association has some excellent tips and techniques on encouraging resilience in the children in your life. Give these ideas a try:
Last but not the least, teach your child to accept that change is an inevitable part of living, and that we can always replace goals that have become unattainable with new, more relevant goals (APA Help Center, n.d.). Resilience TrainingBesides self-learned resilience and teaching resilience to kids, you might want to take it even further and sign up for a course. A highly recommended course is the Realizing Resilience Masterclass which will improve your own resilience skills, but also equip you to coach others in resilience. Complete with 6 modules and a certificate upon completion, this course will help you be an excellent teacher, parent, coach or even a great friend, able to bounce back despite the challenges in life. 10 Quotes on ResilienceIf you want to get a better handle on resilience or share your insights with others, you might find one or more of these quotes can help you reach your goals.
Jodi Picoult
Dieter F. Uchtdorf
Woodrow Wilson
Hellen Keller
Robert Jordan
Shane Koyczan
Elizabeth Edwards
Greg Kincaid
Mary Holloway
Steve Maraboli A Take-Home MessageYou probably already knew that resilience is an important trait to have, but this piece stressed another important concept: that you have the power to build your own resilience (and to help the children in your life develop resilience). We so often forget about how much power we have over our lives and our circumstances. I hope this piece has reminded you that you do indeed have the power to improve your resilience and build your competence and confidence in yourself. What are your thoughts on resilience? Do you think any of the related concepts are more important to develop? Are you not convinced that resilience is as vital as everyone says? What do you do to build your own resilience? Let us know in the comments section below! Thanks for reading! We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our 3 Resilience Exercises for free.
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