Do cats know when you kiss them

Domestic cats, especially those that are allowed to go outside, are more than capable of finding food on their own, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t like a rare treat from you now and then. Giving them cat treats, catnip, or the occasional table scrap will do wonders for your relationship. If you combine catnip with a special toy, as The Spruce Pets suggests, then you’ll end up with a very happy tabby. 

I’ve often wondered what my cats think when I give them hugs and kisses.

Do they know that they’re signs of affection from me, or do they just think I’m being weird?

Perhaps they think my kisses are a bizarre attempt at grooming them!

Related: What is my cat thinking?

I went on a journey to discover the answer to the burning question of “do cats know that huge & kisses are a sign of affection.”

Read on to discover what I found out!

Related: 7 Unmistakable Signs Your Cat Loves You

Related: Why does my cat sleep on my feet

Recently, I wrote an article about whether or not cats give hugs – and the surprising answer was that they do.

Likewise, they understand to a significant extent the meaning behind us hugging and kissing them.

Cats are independent but affectionate creatures.  Much of their time is spent grooming themselves and each other – and even us if they have the opportunity.  While grooming may have obvious hygienic purposes, in many species – including our feline friends – it is also a social activity.

So, it turns out I was kind of right: cats do think our kisses are a weird type of grooming! Let’s learn a bit more about that.

Related: Ways to bond with your cat

Your kisses = affectionate grooming!

Kittens are used to being groomed right from birth by their mother.  It is a necessary part of their development and a source of comfort, as well as a means to strengthen the bond between them.

Kisses from humans really aren’t all that much different, and many cats seem to interpret them as such.  I have a cat who – as a kitten – would sit in our arms and tilt his head towards whomever was holding him.  We would kiss the top of his head, he would reach up and rub the top of his head as though he was washing it, and then he would tilt his head up again to repeat the process.

Don’t tell him I told you this (he would be so embarrassed) but now, even as a crotchety old man (he’s 12, so not really very old at all – but he’s been at that “you kids get off my lawn” stage for years) he will still crawl into our laps and stretch up so that we can “wash” his head.

Now that we know that cats do understand hugs and kisses as signs of affection, let’s talk a bit about how to get your kitty used to all that lovin’!

How to get your cat used to your signs of affection

Cats can be reluctant to change, so they will likely be more receptive to your hugs and kisses if they have been exposed to human physical affection from a young age.

In many ways, they look at us as they would their mothers – especially in cases where they were weaned too young – and will indeed expect that grooming and bonding behavior from us.

Go slow and easy

That being said, even an older cat can learn to love snuggles if they are introduced at their own pace – and not, as comes to mind, like a certain cartoon character from the 90s who approached anything furry with the phrase “I’m going to hug you, and squeeze you, and love you to pieces!”

Letting your child be the first to hug a cat might not be the most sound advice either, come to think of it..

Teach your kids to respect kitty

Small children should always be supervised during their interactions with pets – nothing makes a cat skittish faster than constant mauling by small, rough hands.

Teach your children to respect Kitty, to approach the cat slowly and gently, and to speak softly around animals, and your children will quickly learn animal handling skills and empathy that puts them years ahead of their peers.  They will also have a friend for the life of the pet, which is a gift they won’t easily come by elsewhere.

Remember, you’re much bigger than your cat!

Always keep in mind that our sheer size in comparison to cats can be intimidating, and overwhelming them with too much too quickly can be hazardous to both your health.  Many cats do not like to be tightly restrained, either – so hugs should be gentle and not causing the cat to feel trapped.

Accept that not all cats love hugs

Some cats will never get used to what we think of as hugs, but may choose to be close to you on their own terms.  My parents have a cat that hates to be petted – they’ve had her since she was very young, and their other cats love snuggles, but this one doesn’t let you touch her.  She will, however, climb into your lap and snuggle there for hours as long as you don’t touch her.

There could be a number of reasons for this.  She may have trust issues (although where those would have come from is a mystery, and she sleeps awfully soundly on people’s laps), or she could get over-stimulated – in which case any real touch at all could be more than she knows how to handle.

Say “I love you” in their language!

Your cat can most likely learn to understand and enjoy your gestures of affection towards them, but why not try changing it up a little occasionally and saying it in their own language too

Related: Cat Body Language

Related: Cat Body Language?  When your cat is watching you, slowly – very slowly – blink your eyes at them a few times. Check out this video with tips on how to speak cat:

If they’re in your arms, try a gentle “head butt” (and by this I mean leaning your forehead down to theirs – you don’t want to hurt them).  These are both ways that they typically let you know how they feel.

Bridge the gap in communication, and see how much the bond between you strengthens – you might be surprised at just how affectionate your so-called “independent” kitty can be.

Does your cat have any other favorite signs of affection other than hugs and kisses? Share below!

Stephanie Croswell-Mullin

Out of all species that humans have lived with for ages, cats are probably the most difficult to completely figure out.

Acting like special snowflakes with personalities on their own, cats are the type of creatures that can really surprise you in many ways. Because each feline friend is so different, it is hard to figure out every cat's likes and dislikes when it comes to the food you give them, the bed they sleep in or the toys they play with.

Moreover, they can act like a lady you need to win over and you, their owner, need to take on the role of their admirer. But how do you approach them? How to win them over and show you truly love and care about them? How about a kiss?

Typically for us, modern homo sapiens, we like to kiss and hug everything we love and think is cute. As confident in the fact that that is the best way to demonstrate affection as we are, we simply presume cats like kisses as much as we do, but, here is the thing.

They have no idea what kisses are. Matter effect, they don’t speak the kiss language, at least not the way we might understand.

Our feline friends have their own ways of ending a kiss and it is not as nearly as touchy-feely as ours is. If they want to kiss you they will simply blink.

Yep, that is right. If a cat slowly blinks at you it means they care about you and want you to know that they truly feel great in your company. In their love language that is a sign of appreciation as they really like you and feel safe around you.

So, the next time you get a fairly relaxed, almost bored blink, do not worry. It is not a sign that you bore your furry friend. It is just a kiss from the distance, but a kiss is a kiss and that's what truly counts, right?

While they find your kisses very odd and probably don’t understand what it all means, one thing is for sure, and that is that they do understand that it is some way of affection. Because you act overall friendly and probably the kiss with a smile or gentle touches, over time they usually learn it is your way of caring for them and showing how much they mean to you.

Giving them a gentle rub on the belly along with kisses on the top of the head or slow blinking before you lean in to kiss them can form a nice behavioral pattern that helps them understand what it all means in your human world.

This is why some cats may grow really fond of any kind of kisses, while others may develop an aversion and it has absolutely nothing to do with you. So, if your kitty acts annoyed when you try to give them a peck on the head, don’t worry, it doesn’t mean they don’t love you.

It is just that some cats are just wired that way, just like some like to be active more than other feline buddies or prefer salmon over tuna.

Now, you may wonder, do cats like to be kissed?

Just like with everything else related to cats' and their personalities, the truth is, you can absolutely never know how they are going to react to you lavishing emotion on them that way.

Not only all cats have different preferences, but every cat may change their preferences based on their current mood.

Some like being kissed, some don’t. Moody creatures, aren't they? One day they may enjoy cuddling, letting you kiss them as much as you want. The other day, however, they may turn their heads on the other side, like you are the arch-enemy or someone who is disturbing their peace.

For this reason, you simply need to know your cat well so you don’t get freaked out in case they refuse you or get finicky about the loving way you treat them. Unless you are all over the place like an aunt from the countryside who hasn't seen their nephew for five years and so she needs to kiss the nephew at least a hundred times, remember, it is not you, it’s them.

They do understand what you are trying to do ad they do care about you as much as you do about them, but sometimes they are just not in the mood to pretend to be a cutie and they would rather just lay down and enjoy the benefits of being allowed to be spoiled and loved by you.

While some owners like to lavish as much affection on their cats and cats really like that it is important to know that not only cats have preferences about how they like to be cared for, but there are some preferences humans need to have too.

No matter how much you invest in your furry friend's dental health, be aware that cats mouth is frequently full of all kinds of bacteria, some of which can be harmful to your health.

This is why in the battle kisses on the mouth versus kisses on the forehead, it always kisses on the forehead that should win, at least when health is concerned.

So remember, if you really feel the need to kiss them and they really seem to love that kind of expression, try to avoid the mouth area and instead turn to different actions, like rubbing the belly or kissing their smart little head.